Breaking up isn’t always hard to do

Most of us have had it happen. You lose a client, a Twitter follower, a blog subscriber. Sometimes its baffling and may even hurt your feelings. But sometimes, not so much.

Rather than taking any of it as a personal insult, see it for what it really is: an issue of incompatability. There is no fault or blame to be placed when its just a matter of a personality mismatch. I’ve had it happen to me. I’ve lost Twitter followers and I’ve lost clients. In most cases, I’ve shrugged it off. In a couple of cases, I’ve actually been relieved. The only ones that have ever baffled me are the Twitter followers who will follow me then unfollow me then follow me again, lather rinse repeat. I don’t get that one at all! Do they not remember that they’ve followed you before? Are they just trying to trick people into following them back so they can increase their numbers then balance them out by unfollowing? If anyone has an explanation for that, let me know!

Anyway, I’ve seen people – especially new VAs – get really discouraged when a client relationship didn’t work out. When it happens to you, don’t take it as a sign that you did something wrong or you’re not cut out for this. (Unless it happens over and over again and you’re not hanging on to any of your clients…then it may be a sign to reconsider if this is really something you’re happy doing.)

Use it as a learning experience.

Review your history with the person and see if the expectations were clear. If not, examine your communication methods. Are you readily available to take phone calls for a client who prefers being able to reach you at any time? Do you use email, project management systems, or regularly scheduled chat sessions to stay in touch? We all have our personal preferences and a difference in those preferences can create problems. It doesn’t mean that one method is better than the other. The important thing is that they’re acceptable to all involved.

Take a look at the kind of work you were doing for them. Did you take on a project that was outside of your skill range? Were you handling tasks that you really dread doing? If that’s the case, you may want to reevaluate the services you are offering. If its something you don’t like, try outsourcing it to someone who enjoys those kinds of tasks. If its something you wanted to do but just didn’t have the skills for it, look into some training in that area and make it a goal to become proficient enough to offer this service in the future.

Consider the personality matches. If you’re a take charge kind of person, working with a hands-on client may not be ideal. If you prefer having things laid out for you, you’ll do well with clients who are very detailed when delegating rather than the laid back types who prefer not to mess with the details.

Not every working relationship is the right one. As with any other relationship in your life – friends, dating – sometimes you click with each other right off the bat, sometimes it starts off lukewarm until things fall into place, and sometimes it just doesn’t work out.

This is one of the great things about running your own service-based business. You’re in a position to decide who you want to work with. If it had been like that in Cubicle World, none of us would’ve ever been stuck with one of those chatty co-workers who spends ten minutes every morning blabbing about what she watched on TV the night before. Oh yes! I’ve had one of those!